Can anybody find me somebody to love?

"The spaces between your fingers were created so that another's could fill them in."
Author:Anonymous

GAHH.

The romance bug bit me again, inducing me to reveal my truest, deepest self: a complete and utter hopeful romantic. :D

This is killing me. I don't know why humans become lovesick puppies by the curious age of adolescence. I mean, I know, of course, it's to keep the race of humanity going. But it kills me to yearn for a somebody to love, for a somebody to love me.

I even hate how I'm sounding like right now. I sound so lovesick and pathetic.

That's the word. PATHETIC.

Anyway, since almost no one who knows me personally actually reads these stuff, I might as well type down everything I'm feeling no matter how vulnerable and pathetic it makes me.

I just want the feeling of having someone holding my hand, hugging me, ...ehehehhehe...kissing me. I dunno. It's not even about sex, or procreation...fornication, etcetera, etcetera. It's just I know people need to be needed and need to need. I want somebody to fill up the spaces a friend can't. It's just that simple. I want to be able to hug somebody--okay, FINE, I'll admit it--a boy, or a man, because I can.

You see, being raised by conservative parents in a pretty conservative country, I am not allowed to have a boyfriend until the ripe age of 30....

Just kidding. But I am not allowed to have one until I finish college.

And my parents advised me against hugging people of the opposite sex because I am quite filled in that front area and doing so might give them the wrong idea...even if THEY are my cousin. Oh, the gifts and curses of being a curvy girl... Hahaha. The perfect soundtrack for me right now is Britney Spear's old hit: I'm not a girl, not yet a woman.

Well, I also know I don't really have the time for someone special in my life right now. (When I do get into a relationship, I don't want it to be a simple fling I can easily toss away. Whenever I do anything, I let myself, everything I have pour into it. And being a kind of busy thing-in-between-a-girl-and-a-woman, I prolly don't have as much time as needed to give my heart and soul to someone else.) And perhaps, I have not the maturity it requires either. But I'm not really sure about the latter. I guess all I can do right now is trust in God and trust that one day he will deliver to me my soul mate which makes the waiting all the more worth it and bearable.

(Before I get sued: beautiful picture courtesy of the shady sources of wonders and wares of the fantastical Google. AND quote courtesy of Zen Quotes)